Previous England captain Lewis Moody has revealed he has been found to have motor neurone disease and stated he cannot yet confront the full ramifications of the muscle-wasting condition that claimed the lives of other rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The 47-year-old athlete, who was involved in the World Cup champion 2003 side and secured several English and European titles with Leicester, gave an interview to BBC Breakfast two weeks after finding out he has the illness.
"There's an element of facing the future and being reluctant to completely absorb that at the minute," he commented.
"It's not that I don't understand where it's going. We understand that. But there is absolutely a unwillingness to face what's ahead for now."
Moody, talking alongside his wife Annie, states rather he feels "peaceful" as he focuses on his immediate wellbeing, his family and making preparations for when the disease worsens.
"Possibly that's shock or possibly I handle situations differently, and once I have the information, it's easier," he stated further.
Initial Symptoms
Moody learned he had MND after observing some lack of strength in his shoulder while working out in the gym.
After physical therapy was ineffective for the problem, a series of scans showed neural pathways in his neurological system had been compromised by MND.
"You receive this medical finding of MND and we're rightly quite affected about it, but it's quite odd because I think nothing's wrong," he continued.
"I don't experience ill. I don't sense unwell
"My indications are rather minimal. I have a bit of muscle deterioration in the fingers and the shoulder.
"I continue to be competent to performing anything and everything. And hopefully that will carry on for as long as is possible."
Illness Advancement
MND can advance rapidly.
According to the charity MND Association, the disease takes the lives of a 33% of people within a year and over half within 730 days of diagnosis, as eating and breathing become more difficult.
Therapy can only delay deterioration.
"It isn't ever me that I am upset for," commented an affected Moody.
"It's about the sadness around having to inform my mum - as an single child - and the consequences that has for her."
Family Impact
Speaking from the household with his wife and their pet dog by his side, Moody was consumed with emotion when he discussed informing his sons - 17-year-old Dylan and 15-year-old Ethan - the heartbreaking news, stating: "This was the hardest thing I've ever had to do."
"These are two excellent boys and that was quite upsetting," Moody stated.
"We positioned ourselves on the couch in tears, Ethan and Dylan both embraced in each other, then the dog bounded over and began licking the moisture off our faces, which was rather funny."
Moody explained the focus was being in the present.
"We have no cure and that is why you have to be so militantly concentrated on just embracing and appreciating everything now," he commented.
"As my wife mentioned, we've been really lucky that the primary determination I made when I left playing was to spend as much time with the kids as feasible. We don't get those periods back."
Sportsman Association
Professional sportspeople are excessively affected by MND, with research indicating the rate of the illness is up to six times higher than in the broader public.
It is believed that by reducing the air available and causing harm to nerve cells, regular, strenuous training can trigger the illness in those previously vulnerable.
Rugby Playing Days
Moody, who won 71 England caps and competed with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was nicknamed 'Mad Dog' during his professional days, in recognition of his courageous, relentless style to the game.
He participated through a stress fracture of his leg for a time with Leicester and once caused a workout altercation with colleague and friend Martin Johnson when, irritated, he left a tackle pad and started participating in physical contacts.
After entering as a substitute in the Rugby World Cup decisive match win over Australia in 2003, he secured a ball at the end of the line-out in the crucial phase of play, setting a foundation for scrum-half Matt Dawson to attack and Jonny Wilkinson to score the victory-securing drop kick.
Support Network
Moody has earlier told Johnson, who captained England to that championship, and a handful of other ex- colleagues about his condition, but the others will be discovering his news with the remainder of public.
"There shall be a moment when we'll need to rely on their assistance but, at the present, just having that kind of care and recognition that people are present is what's important," he said.
"This game is such a wonderful family.
"I told to the kids the other day, I've had an amazing life.
"Even should it finished now, I've enjoyed all of it and embraced all of it and got to do it with remarkable people.
"When you get to label your enthusiasm your vocation, it's one of the most important privileges.
"Achieving this for so considerable a duration with the teams that I did it with was a pleasure. And I know they will wish to support in every way they can and I look forward to having those conversations."
